Dinner At Maxine's.

I'm in Danville visiting Mama Hawthorne. Tomorrow is her 95th birthday. When in Danville, I always stay at Maxine's home and cook for her to earn my keep. I'm pretty sure I'm outstaying my welcome this time and I don't think even lobster would be enough to thank her. Yesterday for dinner, I planned to serve shrimp done two ways - boiled shrimp with a horseradish cocktail sauce and fried coconut shrimp with a pineapple salsa. And of course, I needed something green. I chose fried green beans. Gotta get those veggies in you. I first went to a seafood market here and regretfully paid $12/pound for medium-sized shrimp which damn near killed me since I've been buying heads-on jumbo shrimp at home for $3/pound. I went back to Mama Hawthorne's, peeled the shrimp, seasoned the water with assorted spices I found in the cabinet since Old Bay is not heard of here, and dropped my shrimp into the seasoned, boiling water for a minute or so, then drained them. I made a strong cocktail sauce with about a cup of ketchup, about 4 TB of horseradish, or enough to wake up my sinuses, 2 TB Lea & Perrins Worcestershire sauce, and the juice of one lemon.

Next, I made my pineapple salsa.

My ingredients: 1 can crushed pineapple 2-3 TB sweet orange marmalade 1/2 red onion, chopped 1 small red pepper, chopped 3 scallions, sliced 1 jalapeno, minced 1/2 jar pimientos grated zest and juice of one lime cilantro, chopped, to taste

I started shooting pictures, then got distracted, so just imagine all those ingredients together. I always find it difficult prepping and cooking in someone else's kitchen since things I consider staples can oft times be exotic, esoteric ingredients for others. Plus, I don't have my Wusthof knife and I flove my Wusthof. Prep work done, I headed over to Maxine's to set the table, get my stations set up, and uncork the wine while Maxine went off to church. I told her to please say hello to God for me and she assured me she would. First the veggies - green beans.

I made a simple batter of flour, the juice and grated zest of one lemon, freshly ground salt and pepper, cayenne pepper, and enough beer to make a nice coatable batter.

I added the trimmed beans to the batter and tossed to coat.

After frying to a nice golden brown, I drained the beans and sprinkled some more cayenne and zested more lemon over top. I let the beans sit in a low, low oven (125 degrees) to keep warm and crisp while I fried the shrimp, which by the way, I forgot to butterfly. I had my frying station set up, which by the way, I forgot to photograph, but you've seen it before. Seasoned flour, egg, coconut. About 6, Maxine got home from church and her lovely friend, Camille, breezed in, looking as if she was ready to attend the Kentucky Derby, sans chappeau. Oops, I didn't know this was a black tie event. Camille was wearing a quite fetching black and white number, with gauzy, flowing sleeves, which reminded me a lot of some of Sandra's outfits when she fries and has the "salmonella sleeves" which she drags through raw meat, contaminating everything she touches. And you Fandras out there know exactly what I'm talking about. Camille informed us she had been working in the yard all day, and I must say, she cleans up real, real good. Now this kind of reminds me of the time Maxine and I were invited to dine at Red Lobster with Brother and Sister In Law Hawthorne. When the hostess greeted us, I was getting ready to ask for Brother Hawthorne's table when she interrupted me and motioned us to follow her right on back to his table. I asked her how she knew I was with Brother Hawthorne's party. She just looked at my T-shirt and said, "You have his name plastered across your chest." I was kind of scratching my head over this one because most anyone under thirty would, no doubt, have on a similarly named shirt. I'll give you a clue here: It kinda rhymes with Zombie and Bitch. Anyways, we get to the table and I mention this to Brother Hawthorne and he just says, "I told her to look for two women coming in and one would be impeccably dressed and accessorized and the other one would look like a bag lady." As I've said before, Maxine is the daughter Mama Hawthorne wanted, but instead, she got me. So, once again, I'm in the midst of fashionistas, with coiffed hair, makeup, jewelry, and style oozing out of their pores. And I'm wearing this. Anyways, about this time, Sister Hawthorne shows up along with Brother and Sister In Law Hawthornes. Sister is staying for dinner and Brother and S-I-L are just dropping by to say hello, having just been at a pig pickin'. I heated my oil up and started frying the coconut shrimp and, not used to Maxine's cook top, totally burned the crap out of the first few shrimp I put in. Of course, Brother Hawthorne took this opportunity to ask me if I was going to take pictures of my blackened shrimp and blog about it. Shit happens. Brother Hawthorne is always anxious, restless, and hyper and can't stick around for any amount of time, so he told Sister In Law Hawthorne it was time to go. She'd had about 2 sips of her wine when he took the glass out of her hand and set it on the counter. I offered Sister In Law Hawthorne the wine cork to take with her to suck on in the car on the ride home but she declined. Here's our spread:

Maxine had made a nice salad with mixed greens, yellow heirloom tomatoes, avocado, and olives.

And here's my boiled shrimp with cocktail sauce, fried coconut shrimp with pineapple salsa, and Maxine's rice. I do believe this was enjoyed by all.

And here's Maxine's backyard the next morning. Gotta love Maxine's backyard.