Friday, April 1, 2011

Rosie's Swan Song.

It is with a heavy heart that I write this - my final post. Due to circumstances beyond my control, Kitchens Are Monkey Business will cease to exist. I thank all my readers for supporting me over the years. Your encouragement has sustained me; however, I cannot continue. I've decided to subsist off of Hamburger Helper, white bread, Jello, Kwanzaa Kakes, pumpkin pie spice, seasoning packets canned beans, and canned peas for the rest of my life. There's really not a whole lot to write about that, so I bid you adieu from my blog. That said, that's a heck of a lot of material with which to develop a new cooking show. I'm turning in my whisks, wooden spoons, and my Kitchen Aid for a can opener, ReaLemon, canned frostings, and store-bought angel food cakes. Sandra Lee? You win! Actually, what's happened is that Food Network contacted Rosie Hawthorne of KitchensAreMonkeyBusiness and they want ROSIE to be THE NEXT FOOD NETWORK STAR!!!!!!!!!! I don't even have to compete since they knew I'd beat the other contestants hands down with crushing blows. They've given me my own show. I have full control over the content. I ROCK! I am a DIVA! I will be on at 3:15 - 3:45 AM alternate Tuesday mornings in months without r's. Except when there's a full moon, and then you'll have a Rosie marathon. Please set your VCRs, Tivo's, and DVRs! Love, Rosie P.S. Mr. Hawthorne and I are in negotiations for a post-nuptial agreement.

4 comments:

zzzadig said...

I heard that Mars is coming so close to the earth that it will seem like the full moon. There is also a report that it has been proven that all the fresh water on earth has at one time been Coca Cola.

The date does not escape me, but I have another 364 days to be a fool.

Marilyn said...

Happy April Fool's Day to you too, Rosie dear!

Anonymous said...

What's that saying? It's hard to fool a fool, you old fool you!

Rosie Hawthorne said...

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Or it might be another verb. I forget.