Tuesday, October 16, 2012

Congratulations, Sleep In Inn And Suites In Albemarle, NC.

 The Hawthornes have selected the Sleep In Inn and Suites
in Albemarle, North Carolina,
as the recipient of the coveted Hawthorne #1 Breakfast Award -
as in the 
and we've had plenty of sorry-ass breakfasts
across this great country of ours,
from Atlantic to Pacific.

Sleep In Inn and Suites.
You have plumbed new depths
which I didn't think possible.

 After the Hawthornes returned, 
breakfastless, to their room,
to dine on fresh strawberries, 
some of the biggest green grapes you've ever seen,
Tropicana OJ with "Lots of Pulp,"
and prunes
(We come prepared.
We travel with a plug-in cooler.),
I decided to go back down
to the EMPTY (!!?? shocker??!!) breakfast room
and shoot pictures of the spread.

Apparently, the breakfast lady
didn't like that,
but nothing stops Rosie when she's on a mission.

 We don't eat sweets.

We don't eat white.

 There was a sign on the refrigerator 
reminding whomever to put out the loaf of whole wheat bread.

There was no whole wheat bread.
Only white.

We don't eat cereal.

There is NO PROTEIN.

And furthermore, this is the only hotel we've been to
that skimped on the towels.
Everywhere else, there are 2 towels per person.
Here, only 1 towel,
and 1 towel does not cut it.

Kudos, Sleep In Inn and Suites!

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