My good friend, Ticky,
of Reinventing A Boomer blogdom,
recently emailed me.
She had tickets for the Hawthornes and Glowria
to attend the Virginia Beach Flower and Garden Expo
this past weekend.
Once again, Mr. Hawthorne is the rooster
in this little coven of hens.
Drivin' Miz. Rosie.
And Miz. Glowria.
To meet Miz. Ticky at the Convention Center.
It was a gray and dismal Saturday
Had Mr. Hawthorne been at home,
he'd be curling up to watch his morning movie right now.
Instead, Mr. Hawthorne is a Grumble Bear this morning.
He doesn't like rain.
He doesn't like to get wet.
He likes to stay indoors when there is inclement weather.
He does not like to venture out.
He doesn't like how his hair gets in humidity.
And he's driving two hens 1 1/2 + hours to Virginia Beach
to go to a FLOWER SHOW.
To meet up with another hen.
Just thought I'd set the scene here
for Mr. Hawthorne's Grand Gesture and Ultimate Sacrifice
for our little excursion.
What a sport!
The Virginia Beach Convention Center is huge.
As in 500,000 square feet.
So you can imagine the size of the parking lot.
I alert Mr. Hawthorne to a little red car pulling out of a space.
He pulls in.
We get out and what are the odds
that we would park right next to Ticky's car?
Karma, I tell ya!
This was meant.to.be.
Glowria and Mr. Hawthorne up ahead.
Did I mention this was a gray day?
Inside the convention center.
Many years ago,
XKT took me to this event for my birthday.
And it was truly spectacular.
The displays were set up to draw you in
from one landscaped area to the next.
Each display landscape was like walking into
someone's intimate garden.
The gardens lured you from one to the next.
Very well-designed.
It was quite an experience.
This time was nothing like that.
The place was wide open, with vendors hawking
all sorts of crap.
The lighting was horrible.
I didn't have a proper flash.
Yada yada yada.
There's a display area in the lobby where you can buy plants.
Nothing tickled my fancy.
Then I entered the Flower Show.
Like I said, wide open.
Booths and displays everywhere
but no focal point.
Nowhere to start.
So I immediately turn to my left
and will work my way around clockwise.
The first display is china and flowers
and a volunteer comes up to me
and starts talking about TABLESCAPES!
And this one won the Blue Prize.
My head was starting to spin,
so I left that area immediately.
Here's a nice little area.
I was wearing my Uggs
and having a problem not stepping up when I walked
into the different areas.
There was always a little step.
So I kept tripping.
I liked the waterfall with the cool lights.
Lame beach scene.
Bunch of flower arrangements,
which did absolutely nothing for me.
Gaudy crap.
Auntie Hawthorne used to do the loveliest arrangements.
Nothing here came close to hers.
OK.
I liked this.
I want a smoke feature in my garden.
Uh oh.
Glow's going to try out the hammock.
And speaking of swinging hammocks,
may I just say "Bunk Beds" is the funniest thing I've heard all day.
You know who you are.
And, once again,
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sorry, Dear Readers, can't do it now,
but remind me to tell you that story some day.
After the rawness wears off.
As I said, "Uh oh."
This does not bode well for Glowria.
Not to worry.
Glow quickly recovered.
Then Glow espied a member of the mosquito squad, ...
... and, having the attention span of a gnat,
leaped out of the hammock
and glommed onto to him.
She noticed he'd been working out.
We ran into the Mad Hatter outside.
Stay tuned for our lunch at Forbidden City in Virginia Beach,
in which we meet Ticky's beau.
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