Giada Update.

Weeks ago, when I saw our Giada sporting this sad little demure number, I admit I was a bit worried,

as I'm sure some of my gentleman readers were too.

Was this a sign of things to come?

NOT TO WORRY! Rosie wipes sweat off her brow. Our Giada is back in full glory.

Now, on to Giada and her numerous poses.

This is the pose I refer to as the Regal Giada.

She is perched on her royal throne

and looks down her Romanesque nose

at the little people who gather at her feet

as she throws out culinary titty-bitty bones to her

ever-so-grateful subjects.

Oooh, Giada. Did something not settle properly on your palate? Or is it your upper lip you're smelling?

Oh great. You've quickly recovered. All's right in my world.

Notice, she's wearing the royal purple.

Enough of the Royal Giada ensconced on her throne. Let's go on to Framed Boobs Giada.

Lots of times when Giada is talking,

her hands are gesticulating wildly

and she ends up framing and accentuating

les girls.

Now this one is more than a Framed Boob Giada. It's a Hefted Bosom Giada. New category.

See? She's totally hefting.

Frame those knockers, Girlfriend!

Now, it's on to the Giada Bendover.

The Giada Extreme Bendover.

And now we have the pose I refer to as

the Just Giada,

because, well, this is just Giada.

Girl's got a set of choppers.

Yes, I know. They're faaaaaaabulous.

Looks like she's checking to be sure

they're still there.

She does seem a bit proud,

does she not?

Heh.

(12)

Now, lets move on to the shots where the photographer

might have been a tad distracted ...

... the shots where there's no food, no face,

just cleavage.

Cause nothing says cooking like cleavage.

I call this "Boobs On A Platter."

"I'll have the breast meat, thank you."

And here's the famous Giada Reach:

I don't know about you,

but when working in my kitchen,

I always have things purposely placed

just outside my reach,

so I have to streeeeeeeeetch to retrieve them.

Attention!

Attention!

I believe we have a Reach and a Heft.

Giada, honey,

maybe you shouldn't have had

those last few glasses of wine.

I loved this shot. How many fingers does Giada have?

OK. Here's my question. I know Todd, Mr. De Laurentiis, is a designer for Anthropologie, but somebody, anybody tell me: WTF is he wearing?

And please, someone refill Giada's glass.