Mr. Hawthorne and I
have had issues
with the Hawthorne boys
and their parking preferences.
We have an ample parking lot.
There's a hard parking pad
that extends across the front
and the rest is mulched and hard-packed
back to the grass and garden area.
If you drive in that area
and
park on the diagonal
you can get at least 6 cars in -
not 2 parallel-parked.
Daughter Hawthorne and I GET this.
The Hawthorne Males do not.
Other males who come over don't get it.
Other females who come over get it.
Anyways,
I digress.
Back to Youngest Hawthorne's parking woes.
He doesn't want to park
"over there"
because his car is not 4-wheel drive
and he shouldn't be expected to drive
through "this crap" to park,
"this crap" being hard-packed mulch.
Plus, he tells us,
the only place he would park
is on the concrete pad in front,
blocking anyone else's access.
But then he found out there was a power line
overhead
and all the birds crapped on his car.
So he always parks at the very end
of an empty driveway.
Whenever Mr. H. and I come back home,
YH's car is blocking our entry.
We have constantly told him,
"Do NOT park in the driveway."
Heh heh heh.
I went outside,
saw this onslaught of fecal material
on YH's vehicle
and just had to laugh.
I immediately went in and asked him
if he'd seen his car.
I gently explained to him
that a flock of diarrhetic sea gulls
had just flown,
albeit somewhat uncontrollably,
over his ride.
He had just washed and waxed his car, too.
Oh, to capture that expression!
The funny part is
is that Youngest Hawthorne's car
is totally covered.
I checked the driveway
for fecal contamination
and there was none.
Whatsoever.
I examined our two trucks
in the drive
and nothing.
Nada.
Everything was on Youngest Hawthorne's car.
YH calls FOUL PLAY.
VANDALISM.
Damn rogue sea gulls.
I told him to put one of his gun range targets
on top of his car.
Gulls could at least aim.
Funny, I've always told the Foodie Daughter that Karma Bites.
ReplyDeleteThe Foodie Boyfriend was driving the Foodie Daughter's car home recently when a flock of Canadian geese flew overhead. For some odd reason, they felt the need to "decorate" her car.